Every morning my day starts off the same way. Wake up. Pee. Go fill up a water dish with room temperature water, and place it on 2 stacked softball bases that lay on my living room floor. I then make me way back to my bedroom to wake up my best friend. As I enter the room, I usually serenade him with his "wake up song" so that he knows it's going to be time to get his ass out of bed. It goes something like this (in a very groggy, "i just woke up" and off tune voice) "Good morning, good morning, good morning my Jackie boy, Good monring, good morning, Good morning to you!" I then lay on the edge of my bed, give him a good belly rub and scratch behind the ears. I then whisper in his ear "are you ready to go pee?". Jack makes his best effort to stand on his 2 front paws. Once he is on an upright position, I grab his torso and scoop up his 65 pound frame in one full motion. Right hand under the sternum, left hand supporting the butt area. I then stagger to the back door, quickly slip on my flip-flops (lifting 65 uneven pounds while keeping your balance first thing in the morning is NOT an easy task) and make my way out the back door. Once outside, I gently place my buddy on the ground. He always, without fail, makes an attempt to smell the grass around him. I have to remind him that it is "pee time" and to stay still. He listens. I then lift his hind quarters, feel around for the small balloon above his genital region (a.k.a. his bladder) and squeeze it with my ring, middle and pointer fingers of both hands. The tricky part of this is directing the urine that shoots out with reckless abandon. On good days, I'm able to point his "member" where I want the urine to go and zippity do, I'm done. It's that easy almost never. What USUALLY happens is, I grab his bladder squeeze and just hope for the best. The result is Jack and I getting both of our feet soaked in urine. Yes people, I know... gross... but true. The piss comes out like a sputtering sprinkler system to which I have no control. Oh well... so it goes....
So who is Jack? At this point you should be assuming he is my dog (the only other choice may be a very underweight grandparent with poor bladder control and a taste for belly rubs, to which you would be incorrect). About 2 1/2 years ago Jack (a pit/terrier mix, at least that's what I think he is because I adopted him) slipped a disk in his back and went paralyzed in his hind legs. $10,000 and a major surgery later, I was left with this handsome and sweet handicapped dog. Life has changed pretty dramatically since that all went down on December 28th, 2007. Not only because of the aforementioned morning routine, but just how I live, what I do, and where my priorities are. But til this day, I maintain that that was the BEST investment I have ever made. The love, joy, and happiness that I get in return every day makes that financial, time and love commitment sooooo worth it.
Jack is usually at home laying on one of his huge twin size beds that lay in my livingroom floor. If he has somewhere to go, well... he goes. He'll just drag his hind quarters from here to there and from there to here. The real fun starts when he is dragging and crapping at the same time. I have Jack on a pretty good "crap schedule" so that I know when the goods are coming. But every now and then, especially when he gets excited, he'll do the old drag and crap. This usually results in a crap smeared floor and a crap smeared dog. And like I said before... so it goes...
One of the biggest joys of my life is when the weather turns nice, and I can put the Jacker in his fancy Doggy wheelchair. He loves being outside. He's not much of a mingler, as he likes just sniffing anything and everything that he deems interesting. Sometimes he'll get in such a deep "sniffing zone", that he won't be paying attention to where I am. I usually take this opportunity to hide behind a tree (It's probably a good thing I didn't have any younger siblings). Once he lifts his head to notice I'm nowhere to be found, he goes into complete panic mode. He'll start darting his head all over and whining. At this time, I usually jump out from behind the tree screaming "Jackson!" The best part is when he sees me, he'll tilt his head skyward and run towards me as if he hasn't seen me in years. Holy shit, I love this dog.
It's amazing what a man can learn from his dog. Jack was a great dog before his injury. He was fast, obedient, loving, playful, gentle and patient. Since the injury, none of these things have changed and you will never hear a complaint. You will never hear a depressed whine or question his will to live. It was just "OK, yesterday I had hind legs to use, and now... not so much... that's cool, let's roll with it (pun not intended, but kinda is).... Why can't we be like this? Why can't people, for the benefit of their life and well-being, look at things optimistically when life throws them that inevitable curveball? We whine, bitch, complain and make every excuse to why we can't do things. We ARE capable of making this point-of-view switch, but something holds us back. Why can't we just flip that switch and do what is better for ourselves, out family and our life? We CAN, it just takes some readjustment of perspective and a renewed commitment to re-wiring our brain on how we look at things. I am continually on this journey to shift my perspective, and I've learned so much of this from one simple, handsome dog. Thank you Jack for teaching my how to "roll" with things better and thank you God for the experience.
11:22 AM
5:12 PM
Types of woody....
I forgot to mention in my last post, I thought it was pretty awesome that my buddy Joe (the groom in the aforementioned wedding) decided not to use numbers as a way of assigning tables to his guests. Joe, being a bit of a handy man, decided to use the names of types of wood. There was the Oak table. The Cedar table. The Maple table. But he decided to put his college friends at the most precious type of wood known to man. Morning. I can't make this stuff up. :)
12:26 PM
One wedding, some drool and a memory....
What a weekend. My friends Joe and Katie tied the knot and it was one of the better weddings I've been to. The large majority of my college friends were in attendance and good time were running rampid. It's always a good time when this certain collection of college friends get together. We are, by in large, a collection of blowhard idiots and dancing fools (i mean that in the most affectionate way, of course). I haven't sweated (is sweated a word?) like that since the NYC 1/2 marathon. I mean, talk about dancing as if noone was watching. Actually, it probably isn't dancing at all. When all of your limbs move spastically in different directions while you jump around in some sort of tribal ritual dance, is that really dancing? Never the less... it was awesome.
I stuck to my drink of choice, which is JD and gingerale. I'm not a big drinker, but when I do... it's with purpose. Woke up with a bit of a headache and upon checking my cell phone it appears I texted some 30 people simply to tell them I love them them and that I was drinking. I'm sure they were happy to hear that at 2 a.m. Sunday morning.
I feel like with my drinking, I didn't eat as much as i usually would when I "let myself go" for the occasional weekend(as in I made up for my lack of food calories with that of the alcohol kind). I had a little Brie with olives, I ate the fish with greenbeans (didn't eat the potatoes) and skipped the cake. The one thing I did do was eat my weight in eggs at the breakfast buffet. Man, do I love a good breakfast buffet. It is the equivalent of take a heroine addict to a drug den, supplying the needle and telling him/her to "behave". I did, in fact stick to just eggs, to which I am happy about (needless to say it was 2 pretty nice servings of the stuff). Skipped the French toast, bacon, sausage and all the other deliciousness. Just eggs. Ran through me like a hot knife through butter. TMI? Probably... Moving on.....
So the highlight (or lowlight if you ask me) of the early wedding day was at the actual service at the church. While Joe and Katie were exchanging their vows, an odd sound emerged that sounded like a cat in agony. It was a really odd sound. As I turned around to my friend Chris in the pew behind me, I said to him, "Who brought the ca---"? I meant to say, "Who brought the cat?", but at that perfectly timed moment a small... no, no.... a large strand of drool decided it would be a great time to jump out of my mouth down the lapel of my suit and onto the pew in which I sat.
As I looked down and saw my little "escapee", I had hoped that noone took notice. No such luck. As I looked up at the 3 rows behind me filled with my college buddies and some of the groom's family/friends, the red faces and trembling floor due to mass quieted hysteria laughter told me I had been caught. Embarassing moments are God's way of keeping you humble. Thank you God. I'm sure my friends will not let me forget this glorious moment anytime soon.
This morning, I started reading an article in BOSTON magazine about kids and obesity. In the beginning of the article the author talks about his own weight issues as a kid, and referenced the dreaded "Shirts and Skins". Wow, I had not thought about that since highschool. Upon reading this I immediatelty felt uneasy and could feel me heart beating a little harder. Talk about hitting a nerve. If you don't know what shirts and skins are, it is when you are playing a sport (Basketball, football, etc) and the way of differentiating who is on what team, one team will get to wear their shirts, and the other will have to be "skins" or shirtless. I sooo hated being on the skins team. I remember suddenly coming down with a "sudden case of something" on a few occasions if I had to go skins. The majority of my friends were lean, athletic kids. Bobby was sporting skin folds, man boobs and so many stretch marks my stomach looked like an Oklahoma backroad map. No bueno. Man oh man...did I hate Skins. The only thing worse was going to the beach. :)
OK, that's my shpeel for today... have a great day... Kick some ass and live healthy!
BK
I stuck to my drink of choice, which is JD and gingerale. I'm not a big drinker, but when I do... it's with purpose. Woke up with a bit of a headache and upon checking my cell phone it appears I texted some 30 people simply to tell them I love them them and that I was drinking. I'm sure they were happy to hear that at 2 a.m. Sunday morning.
I feel like with my drinking, I didn't eat as much as i usually would when I "let myself go" for the occasional weekend(as in I made up for my lack of food calories with that of the alcohol kind). I had a little Brie with olives, I ate the fish with greenbeans (didn't eat the potatoes) and skipped the cake. The one thing I did do was eat my weight in eggs at the breakfast buffet. Man, do I love a good breakfast buffet. It is the equivalent of take a heroine addict to a drug den, supplying the needle and telling him/her to "behave". I did, in fact stick to just eggs, to which I am happy about (needless to say it was 2 pretty nice servings of the stuff). Skipped the French toast, bacon, sausage and all the other deliciousness. Just eggs. Ran through me like a hot knife through butter. TMI? Probably... Moving on.....
So the highlight (or lowlight if you ask me) of the early wedding day was at the actual service at the church. While Joe and Katie were exchanging their vows, an odd sound emerged that sounded like a cat in agony. It was a really odd sound. As I turned around to my friend Chris in the pew behind me, I said to him, "Who brought the ca---"? I meant to say, "Who brought the cat?", but at that perfectly timed moment a small... no, no.... a large strand of drool decided it would be a great time to jump out of my mouth down the lapel of my suit and onto the pew in which I sat.
As I looked down and saw my little "escapee", I had hoped that noone took notice. No such luck. As I looked up at the 3 rows behind me filled with my college buddies and some of the groom's family/friends, the red faces and trembling floor due to mass quieted hysteria laughter told me I had been caught. Embarassing moments are God's way of keeping you humble. Thank you God. I'm sure my friends will not let me forget this glorious moment anytime soon.
This morning, I started reading an article in BOSTON magazine about kids and obesity. In the beginning of the article the author talks about his own weight issues as a kid, and referenced the dreaded "Shirts and Skins". Wow, I had not thought about that since highschool. Upon reading this I immediatelty felt uneasy and could feel me heart beating a little harder. Talk about hitting a nerve. If you don't know what shirts and skins are, it is when you are playing a sport (Basketball, football, etc) and the way of differentiating who is on what team, one team will get to wear their shirts, and the other will have to be "skins" or shirtless. I sooo hated being on the skins team. I remember suddenly coming down with a "sudden case of something" on a few occasions if I had to go skins. The majority of my friends were lean, athletic kids. Bobby was sporting skin folds, man boobs and so many stretch marks my stomach looked like an Oklahoma backroad map. No bueno. Man oh man...did I hate Skins. The only thing worse was going to the beach. :)
OK, that's my shpeel for today... have a great day... Kick some ass and live healthy!
BK
10:01 AM
Preparing for a weekend of shennanigans
So like I said in my last blog, I have a wedding to go to this weekend. I'll be staying overnight up in Salem, MA and the combination of alcohol and restaurant style food is sure to not be "positive for the body".. but that's a-ok.. Why you ask? PREPERATION
I have kept an overly-conscious eye on my eating lifestyle the last week and a half in preperation for this weekend... and I feel good about giving myself this window of "do whatever the hell I want" this weekend. The workouts/runnings have been coming along as well. Up to 8 mile runs in prep for the 1/2 marathon and got a good resistance workout in yesterday with one of the trainers at the club I work at (The Sports Club/LA). Couple all of that with a softball practice and some swings at the batting cage and I'm feeling good.. DAMN STRAIGHT!
I needed to buy a new suit for this weekend (being that I buy one suit every 5 years, and I was currently on year #7, it was time). Got 2 nice ones from Macy's for $350 combined. Pretty happy about that. Had to go get the suits altered. Going through this process still gives me cold sweats. I remember from my 300+ pound days having to go shopping with my mother for school. I used to hate going there to get a size 52 waist, then having them hemmed down to a 48. Bobby needed a size 52 because his legs were ENORMOUS. I'm talking some real meatloafs here. My mom (Roberta) tells me I used to torture her because I would hate to shop in the "husky" section. They should just call it the "fat kid" section. We know we're fat, you know we're fat... just say it! Calling us the name of a dog breed really doesn't help to make us feel better about the situation. Nevertheless, the whole "getting measured and clothes tailored thing" still hits a nerve for me even though my pants are now at a 34/36 waist. Oh well, no use dwelling... moving on....
Went to see Young Frankenstein at the theatre last night, and I was surprised at how awesome it was. I do like me some theatre from time to time (say what you will), but the energy and music that the show provided left me feeling...well.... let's just say I sang Puttin' on the Ritz for the rest of the night (and to be honest, all the way into work as well this morning)... Go see it if you can!
This will probably be my last post until Monday, so have a good weekend...live healthy and KICK SOME ASS---
BK
I have kept an overly-conscious eye on my eating lifestyle the last week and a half in preperation for this weekend... and I feel good about giving myself this window of "do whatever the hell I want" this weekend. The workouts/runnings have been coming along as well. Up to 8 mile runs in prep for the 1/2 marathon and got a good resistance workout in yesterday with one of the trainers at the club I work at (The Sports Club/LA). Couple all of that with a softball practice and some swings at the batting cage and I'm feeling good.. DAMN STRAIGHT!
I needed to buy a new suit for this weekend (being that I buy one suit every 5 years, and I was currently on year #7, it was time). Got 2 nice ones from Macy's for $350 combined. Pretty happy about that. Had to go get the suits altered. Going through this process still gives me cold sweats. I remember from my 300+ pound days having to go shopping with my mother for school. I used to hate going there to get a size 52 waist, then having them hemmed down to a 48. Bobby needed a size 52 because his legs were ENORMOUS. I'm talking some real meatloafs here. My mom (Roberta) tells me I used to torture her because I would hate to shop in the "husky" section. They should just call it the "fat kid" section. We know we're fat, you know we're fat... just say it! Calling us the name of a dog breed really doesn't help to make us feel better about the situation. Nevertheless, the whole "getting measured and clothes tailored thing" still hits a nerve for me even though my pants are now at a 34/36 waist. Oh well, no use dwelling... moving on....
Went to see Young Frankenstein at the theatre last night, and I was surprised at how awesome it was. I do like me some theatre from time to time (say what you will), but the energy and music that the show provided left me feeling...well.... let's just say I sang Puttin' on the Ritz for the rest of the night (and to be honest, all the way into work as well this morning)... Go see it if you can!
This will probably be my last post until Monday, so have a good weekend...live healthy and KICK SOME ASS---
BK
9:07 AM
Good morning people!
I am a creature of habit. I just like to change up those habits often. I don't even kow whatthat means...haha
So every morning I start my day off with the same breakfast that I've come to love, depend on and love (yes, i know... that's how much I love it)
This little breakfast concoction was the cornerstone and stability of my weight loss escapade.
-Cup(because I'm a big fella) of Oatmeal (the 100% whole rolled oats variety, not the brown sugar/apple shitshow that you think is healthy but is really ass)
-Tablespoon of raw, unsalted almond butter. This is really the secret ingredient. Once you mix this deliciousness in you'll really be cooking with gas....
-handful of blueberries (I have big hands so I get more.. haha!)
-handful of low sugar(less than 10g per serving) of granola
-drizzle raw honey on top
Sounds great, right? Well, it tastes even better than it sounds. You're getting a rockin' carb/natural sugar comboand a fat busting protein source in the almond butter. This mix should keep you satiated and happy for at LEAST 4 hours. I'm 6'3 220 pounds and it keeps my hunger at bay for 5 hours... just in time for lunch...BINGO!
I'm heading to a wedding this weekend, so knowing that I'll be eating food that is not "self prepared", I know I have to REALLY keep my eating in check. Shouldn't be much of an issue cuz at this point in the game I know what works.
What I do need to buckle up is my workouts. I'm training for the "Run to Remember", which is a half marathon in Boston on May 30th. I've been pretty good with my training, but my resistance training has fallen by the wayside. This is something I need to remedy STAT! Going to hit the weights today for at least 45 minutes. Can't be going to this wedding with my college buds feeling like a gummy bear. TIGHTEN UP! They already raz me enough for my former-fat kid days. I love them for it, as it's one of the motivational tools that keep me accountable and driven to stay in shape... hey, I'll use anything I can get as motivation... Giddy up!
Stay positive and kick some ass...
B to the K
I am a creature of habit. I just like to change up those habits often. I don't even kow whatthat means...haha
So every morning I start my day off with the same breakfast that I've come to love, depend on and love (yes, i know... that's how much I love it)
This little breakfast concoction was the cornerstone and stability of my weight loss escapade.
-Cup(because I'm a big fella) of Oatmeal (the 100% whole rolled oats variety, not the brown sugar/apple shitshow that you think is healthy but is really ass)
-Tablespoon of raw, unsalted almond butter. This is really the secret ingredient. Once you mix this deliciousness in you'll really be cooking with gas....
-handful of blueberries (I have big hands so I get more.. haha!)
-handful of low sugar(less than 10g per serving) of granola
-drizzle raw honey on top
Sounds great, right? Well, it tastes even better than it sounds. You're getting a rockin' carb/natural sugar comboand a fat busting protein source in the almond butter. This mix should keep you satiated and happy for at LEAST 4 hours. I'm 6'3 220 pounds and it keeps my hunger at bay for 5 hours... just in time for lunch...BINGO!
I'm heading to a wedding this weekend, so knowing that I'll be eating food that is not "self prepared", I know I have to REALLY keep my eating in check. Shouldn't be much of an issue cuz at this point in the game I know what works.
What I do need to buckle up is my workouts. I'm training for the "Run to Remember", which is a half marathon in Boston on May 30th. I've been pretty good with my training, but my resistance training has fallen by the wayside. This is something I need to remedy STAT! Going to hit the weights today for at least 45 minutes. Can't be going to this wedding with my college buds feeling like a gummy bear. TIGHTEN UP! They already raz me enough for my former-fat kid days. I love them for it, as it's one of the motivational tools that keep me accountable and driven to stay in shape... hey, I'll use anything I can get as motivation... Giddy up!
Stay positive and kick some ass...
B to the K
8:54 PM
What do you mean you can't live without......???
OK, so this is blog #1... you have pretty much no idea who I am, but that has to change.... you ready? Good...
My name is BobbyK and through the this and thats of life, I have lost 140 pounds, care for a paralyzed dog, deal with crappy inner demons, have become a nutrition counselor, yada, yada, yada... we'll get to all of that big and juicy stuff in the future... but for now, just because it's relevant to what I've been hearing a lot about lately... WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT (insert shitty food here)???
This may be the most defeatest, pessimistic and crappy thing I've ever heard... and I hear this crap every day. How can you not live without something that is doing you more harm than good? "Oh but Bobby, chocolate, coffee and ice cream have health benefits ya know".... Oh.. do they? Shut up. Are you really that influenced by everything you read? They publish this crap on purpose to give you that warm and yummy feeling that you're doing something good for yourself. Jokes on you. And you wonder how you gained 20 pounds over the last year eating these beneficial foods.... dumb, dumb, dumb.
Be smart. Your life is on the line here. Your kid's lives are on the line. You have the opportunity to be a trend setter and difference maker in your family, community and world. Change the way you think about food. Yes, this is a VERY difficult thing to do... but that's what I'm here for, and that's what I'm going to be writing about for the rest of time... how to make me and you healthier, more fit and BETTER! Come along for the ride... it'll be bumpy...I guarantee that, but if you stay true to it, stay consistent and gain momentum you will live longer, healthier and kick some ass on your way to a better you. This I GUARANTEE... till next blog....
B to the K
My name is BobbyK and through the this and thats of life, I have lost 140 pounds, care for a paralyzed dog, deal with crappy inner demons, have become a nutrition counselor, yada, yada, yada... we'll get to all of that big and juicy stuff in the future... but for now, just because it's relevant to what I've been hearing a lot about lately... WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT (insert shitty food here)???
This may be the most defeatest, pessimistic and crappy thing I've ever heard... and I hear this crap every day. How can you not live without something that is doing you more harm than good? "Oh but Bobby, chocolate, coffee and ice cream have health benefits ya know".... Oh.. do they? Shut up. Are you really that influenced by everything you read? They publish this crap on purpose to give you that warm and yummy feeling that you're doing something good for yourself. Jokes on you. And you wonder how you gained 20 pounds over the last year eating these beneficial foods.... dumb, dumb, dumb.
Be smart. Your life is on the line here. Your kid's lives are on the line. You have the opportunity to be a trend setter and difference maker in your family, community and world. Change the way you think about food. Yes, this is a VERY difficult thing to do... but that's what I'm here for, and that's what I'm going to be writing about for the rest of time... how to make me and you healthier, more fit and BETTER! Come along for the ride... it'll be bumpy...I guarantee that, but if you stay true to it, stay consistent and gain momentum you will live longer, healthier and kick some ass on your way to a better you. This I GUARANTEE... till next blog....
B to the K
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